Wow, just wow! The courage that I don’t believe I will ever have. So many lines that I recognized that I thought I might have to put my phone down. I’m 53 and not ready to have this conversation with myself. If I’ve made it this long, why can’t I make it a little longer.
Then I read a survivor. Someone who’s found a path to healing without internalizing and burying anymore. I’ve spent a lifetime trying to believe “no, that couldn’t be. It was bad, but was it that bad?”.
I don’t know you, but I know you. You verbalize what I can’t. You give words to what I keep myself busy enough to not stop and think about. I ran marathons to make my body to move until it hurts from my own. making.
This piece shows a love for yourself and a healing journey 💕
Thank you for your courage to write this reply. I believe we have to heal at our own pace. Maybe you weren’t ready before. But maybe you are now. It takes so much patience to sit in the pain. I didn’t run marathons but I made sure I hurt myself in other ways. It’s actually very recently that I stopped self-sabotaging. We can heal together. I love you. I see you. ♥️
Venus… your words carry a weight that deserves to be held with care, not rushed past. What you shared is heartbreaking, but the way you’ve given language to something so deeply buried is powerful in a way most people will never fully understand. What you describe is not confusion, not curiosity, not childhood play — it’s the body doing whatever it can to survive what the mind cannot yet face. And the way you name that now, with clarity and compassion for your younger self, is profoundly moving.
I’m sorry you had to carry that shame alone for so long, especially when you didn’t even have the language for what had been taken from you, I have been abused by the opposite gender during my teens, but it wasn’t much of a big deal because as boys then it was termed as you being cool if you could get more matured than your age, much more a matured lady touching a teenage boy without his consent. But I want you to know this: the strength it takes to return to those moments, to look at them honestly, and to give them meaning now… that’s not just healing, that’s courage at its purest.
Your story is sad, yes. But the way you hold it today, with gentleness, truth, and a steady voice, is incredibly impressive. You are seen in this. Truly. And the way you’ve shared it helps others like me feel less alone with their own unspoken histories. God bless you, Sister.
As always, thank you for reading and for your thoughtful heartfelt response. And am so sorry you have had to live through your own sexual abuse. I don’t know why when it happens to boys there is even less availability to speak on how much damage it can cause. Abuse is abuse is abuse in my world. And we internalize what society refuses to acknowledge. Sending a virtual hug! 🤗
I can relate to this so much. I think parents need to talk to their children about sex as soon as they can understand it emotionally and physically. We are all born sexual. We need not carry shame for our natural desires. Sex is the most natural thing in the world. It is how we came to being alive. Sex is a miracle of life. I think we all need to talk about sex, like it is beautiful, because it can be. There is nothing wrong with having sexual feelings, unless you are pushing them onto someone that does not welcome them. We need deeper sex and sexual intimacy classes when our children are still children. We need sex to be beautiful if we want to survive as a human race.
That’s so true. Until we learn to see it this way and to heal the wounds so many have endured, we can’t make it beautiful as it out to be. Thank so much for your thoughtfulness, as always. Love you so much. ♥️
I love you too dear. I used to write a lot about sexuality and sexual intimacy on other blog sites. Making love is like drinking tea. LOL. It is just another way to show love. I want to erase the naughty feelings people have about their sexuality. It is not bad to feel sexual. If it were, none of us would be alive.
I so agree with all of that. I have always wondered why we couldn’t talk openly about sex as a society, and I have always carried the darkness too. The imprinting of someone else’s shame and lust from before I knew it wasn’t mine to carry.
Your courage here is undeniable. The way you approach your story with clarity, tenderness and grounded truth makes it possible for others to breathe a little easier inside their own. You show how memory can fracture, how the body carries what the mind cannot, and how healing is never a straight line but a long return to oneself.
What touched me most is the honesty in how you describe the innocence before everything changed, and the quiet work of piecing a life together without the words you needed. So many will recognize themselves in that space, even if their stories are different. You give language to something most people carry in silence, and you do it with such care that it feels like a hand offered, not a spotlight.
Thank you for writing this. Thank you for trusting your voice. It matters more than you know 💚
Thank you for your own willingness to respond so honestly as well. These are hard things to talk about and hard things to write about as well. But they are also the most important. I wish to break the silence. That little girl with the sad eyes and the silent, watchful gaze, I want to give her a voice. And for all of us who were voiceless in a world too violent to understand. Wishing you so much love and light on your own healing journey. ❤️
This is such a powerful and necessary reflection. Thank you for giving voice to something so many carry quietly. Your willingness to step into this doorway with honesty and tenderness helps create the kind of grounded, human conversation we’ve been missing for far too long. Sexual healing is part of becoming whole, and naming it without sensationalizing it is an act of courage in itself. Your words remind us that reclaiming our stories is a sacred step toward freedom and that we’re not alone in the journey.
I wept. Illumination at this level of honesty and openness is the hardest to write and comprehend. There is a profound strength within you. Your story both scares and validates me.
Men are never supposed to discuss this. I never talked about my sexual trauma as a child or my sexuality as an adult. Hypnotherapy revealed truths I had buried deep. Not healed, but healing.
You have great awareness and had a lovely partner to support you … supporting each other. I cannot imagine. Thank you for writing this.
It’s so hard for so many of us. We are not taught to talk about any of this. Yet open communication is what we actually need. I hope we can start to change to the narrative around our human sexuality so that we can also heal and keep others safe. It’s the fact that we aren’t encouraged to discuss these things that the cycles are allowed to continue. I see you and I love you for your courage to share here. Keep healing, it’s a choice to not bury our collective pain. ♥️
Thank you, Venus Faye. Yes, breaking the cycle of shame and blame. It still weighs heavy. I find it difficult to speak openly, why I write poetry and tell stories.
Thank you for your post, Venus, it is heartbreaking and distressing to read about the suffering you went through. I hope you find peace with yourself. I think it's important to discuss these subjects, however difficult it is, and thank you for your courage in writing about your experiences. Sexuality is an important part of life, we need to be honest about it to try to ensure that there is an open dialogue in communities. To tell you the truth, I feel schocked, I sennd you warmth and best wishes that your life ahead is filled with the best that life can offer.
Wow, just wow! The courage that I don’t believe I will ever have. So many lines that I recognized that I thought I might have to put my phone down. I’m 53 and not ready to have this conversation with myself. If I’ve made it this long, why can’t I make it a little longer.
Then I read a survivor. Someone who’s found a path to healing without internalizing and burying anymore. I’ve spent a lifetime trying to believe “no, that couldn’t be. It was bad, but was it that bad?”.
I don’t know you, but I know you. You verbalize what I can’t. You give words to what I keep myself busy enough to not stop and think about. I ran marathons to make my body to move until it hurts from my own. making.
This piece shows a love for yourself and a healing journey 💕
Thank you for your courage to write this reply. I believe we have to heal at our own pace. Maybe you weren’t ready before. But maybe you are now. It takes so much patience to sit in the pain. I didn’t run marathons but I made sure I hurt myself in other ways. It’s actually very recently that I stopped self-sabotaging. We can heal together. I love you. I see you. ♥️
Venus… your words carry a weight that deserves to be held with care, not rushed past. What you shared is heartbreaking, but the way you’ve given language to something so deeply buried is powerful in a way most people will never fully understand. What you describe is not confusion, not curiosity, not childhood play — it’s the body doing whatever it can to survive what the mind cannot yet face. And the way you name that now, with clarity and compassion for your younger self, is profoundly moving.
I’m sorry you had to carry that shame alone for so long, especially when you didn’t even have the language for what had been taken from you, I have been abused by the opposite gender during my teens, but it wasn’t much of a big deal because as boys then it was termed as you being cool if you could get more matured than your age, much more a matured lady touching a teenage boy without his consent. But I want you to know this: the strength it takes to return to those moments, to look at them honestly, and to give them meaning now… that’s not just healing, that’s courage at its purest.
Your story is sad, yes. But the way you hold it today, with gentleness, truth, and a steady voice, is incredibly impressive. You are seen in this. Truly. And the way you’ve shared it helps others like me feel less alone with their own unspoken histories. God bless you, Sister.
As always, thank you for reading and for your thoughtful heartfelt response. And am so sorry you have had to live through your own sexual abuse. I don’t know why when it happens to boys there is even less availability to speak on how much damage it can cause. Abuse is abuse is abuse in my world. And we internalize what society refuses to acknowledge. Sending a virtual hug! 🤗
I can relate to this so much. I think parents need to talk to their children about sex as soon as they can understand it emotionally and physically. We are all born sexual. We need not carry shame for our natural desires. Sex is the most natural thing in the world. It is how we came to being alive. Sex is a miracle of life. I think we all need to talk about sex, like it is beautiful, because it can be. There is nothing wrong with having sexual feelings, unless you are pushing them onto someone that does not welcome them. We need deeper sex and sexual intimacy classes when our children are still children. We need sex to be beautiful if we want to survive as a human race.
That’s so true. Until we learn to see it this way and to heal the wounds so many have endured, we can’t make it beautiful as it out to be. Thank so much for your thoughtfulness, as always. Love you so much. ♥️
I love you too dear. I used to write a lot about sexuality and sexual intimacy on other blog sites. Making love is like drinking tea. LOL. It is just another way to show love. I want to erase the naughty feelings people have about their sexuality. It is not bad to feel sexual. If it were, none of us would be alive.
I so agree with all of that. I have always wondered why we couldn’t talk openly about sex as a society, and I have always carried the darkness too. The imprinting of someone else’s shame and lust from before I knew it wasn’t mine to carry.
Your courage here is undeniable. The way you approach your story with clarity, tenderness and grounded truth makes it possible for others to breathe a little easier inside their own. You show how memory can fracture, how the body carries what the mind cannot, and how healing is never a straight line but a long return to oneself.
What touched me most is the honesty in how you describe the innocence before everything changed, and the quiet work of piecing a life together without the words you needed. So many will recognize themselves in that space, even if their stories are different. You give language to something most people carry in silence, and you do it with such care that it feels like a hand offered, not a spotlight.
Thank you for writing this. Thank you for trusting your voice. It matters more than you know 💚
Thank you for your own willingness to respond so honestly as well. These are hard things to talk about and hard things to write about as well. But they are also the most important. I wish to break the silence. That little girl with the sad eyes and the silent, watchful gaze, I want to give her a voice. And for all of us who were voiceless in a world too violent to understand. Wishing you so much love and light on your own healing journey. ❤️
This is such a powerful and necessary reflection. Thank you for giving voice to something so many carry quietly. Your willingness to step into this doorway with honesty and tenderness helps create the kind of grounded, human conversation we’ve been missing for far too long. Sexual healing is part of becoming whole, and naming it without sensationalizing it is an act of courage in itself. Your words remind us that reclaiming our stories is a sacred step toward freedom and that we’re not alone in the journey.
Thanks, love. You're the best. ❤️
🥰
We are on such similar paths🙏🏽 thank you for your courage and sharing the truth and setting yourself free for all of us to witness.
I am happy to be here with you, and sorry for what must have been/still be so challenging! Sending a big hug! 🤗
I wept. Illumination at this level of honesty and openness is the hardest to write and comprehend. There is a profound strength within you. Your story both scares and validates me.
Men are never supposed to discuss this. I never talked about my sexual trauma as a child or my sexuality as an adult. Hypnotherapy revealed truths I had buried deep. Not healed, but healing.
You have great awareness and had a lovely partner to support you … supporting each other. I cannot imagine. Thank you for writing this.
It’s so hard for so many of us. We are not taught to talk about any of this. Yet open communication is what we actually need. I hope we can start to change to the narrative around our human sexuality so that we can also heal and keep others safe. It’s the fact that we aren’t encouraged to discuss these things that the cycles are allowed to continue. I see you and I love you for your courage to share here. Keep healing, it’s a choice to not bury our collective pain. ♥️
Thank you, Venus Faye. Yes, breaking the cycle of shame and blame. It still weighs heavy. I find it difficult to speak openly, why I write poetry and tell stories.
I love you, too.
We got this.
Thanks for sharing this. Not easy to read and must if been harder to write.
It's very brave to get that down and put it out like that. I hope that it brings some catharsis and helps with ongoing healing.
Thank you for your post, Venus, it is heartbreaking and distressing to read about the suffering you went through. I hope you find peace with yourself. I think it's important to discuss these subjects, however difficult it is, and thank you for your courage in writing about your experiences. Sexuality is an important part of life, we need to be honest about it to try to ensure that there is an open dialogue in communities. To tell you the truth, I feel schocked, I sennd you warmth and best wishes that your life ahead is filled with the best that life can offer.
Thanks for reading it and leaving your gratitude. It means a lot. 🙏